After not napping for several hours, I decided to check on her.
Damnit! Did she fling poo again?
OMG, is she bleeding?!?!?
Nope. (but she did do a damn good job of making me believe she was…lots of crying and dramatic effect as a valiant attempt to distract me from the truth.)
Is it makeup?
Crayon. A brown crayon.
How exactly does one get a crayon to color their skin like this? She’s got mad skills, yo.